Skillful Thoughts



Download Series G

Underlined thoughts diminish you – Thoughts with dots empower you

G-1 Dating:

She dumped me; I hate her.

  • She made a nice contribution to my life.
  • I learned some things not to do.
  • I will put more thought and effort into my next relationship.



G-2 Look Before You Leap:

I have never felt so complete, I want to get married ASAP.

  • More than half of all marriages fail, so I will take my time and do my homework.
  • How can I get to know this person on a deeper level so I don’t get blind-sided by the packaging?
  • We will discuss all the items on The Compatibility Checklist G-3 check lists with him or her.



G-3 Compatibility Checklist:

Some of these questions I just couldn’t ask.

  • The questions you’re most reluctant to ask will by where the biggest problems appear.
  • These questions were prepared by thoughtful people who want the best for both of us.
  • We won’t be held to the answers, but they can show our intent and ability to deal with difficult issues.
  • The most essential part of our relationship will be our ability to communicate. If we aren’t good at it we best wait until we can.



G-4 Marriage:

He never listens.

  • If I go out of my way to praise him and show interest in what he is doing, it will make my company and my input more important to him.
  • By being less negative, critical, petty, thankless, and by praising him on occasions, he will be less inclined to avoid me or tune me out.

She nags me constantly.

  • By helping her more and doing “my thing” a little less, we’d keep the closeness we had when we were first married.



G-5 Parenting:

My child tells me she doesn’t like me.

  • On an interpersonal level I have to make the things that are more important to her more important to me
  • She may act indifferent to me, but I have to act is if that isn’t annoy long enough for me to show her that she is and get our chemistry back.
  • That could be her way of getting her way.



G-6 Guiding Your Kids:

My son challenges me all the time.

  • Strong willed children are a lot more work, but in the adult word they tend to achieve greater heights than children who were compliant.
  • The child who is very good at one part of their upbringing can be troublesome in other parts of their life.
  • To keep from reward his challenges I have to side-step respond on my terms and have clear rules and consequences strictly enforced.



G-7 Empowering Your Kids:

I can’t get my kid interested in anything.

  • I will:
    • Determine if there any difficulties with teachers or classmates.
    • Take more interest in all that she does and praise her honest efforts.
    • Be quick to support her interests.
    • Expose her to more interesting subjects.
    • Promote, but not pressure her efforts to interact with her wholesome peers.
    • Allow them more say on some choices.