Skillful Thoughts

SERIES G – CREATE A CLOSE FAMILY

Once you see what switching from cant’s to cans does for your life, try following points below and they will become second nature and make you wise. 

Wisdom is your ability to imagine alternatives and judge their likely outcomes. Just choosing to be wise and keeping at it will make you wise. 

 Underlined thoughts diminish you – Thoughts with dots empower you

G-1 Dating:

She dumped me; I hate her.

• She made a nice contribution to my life.
• I learned some things not to do.
• I will put more thought and effort into my next relationship.

G-2 Look Before You Leap:

I have never felt so complete, I want to get married ASAP.

• More than half of all marriages fail, so I will take my time and do my homework.
• How can I get to know this person on a deeper level so I don’t get blind-sided by the packaging?
• We will discuss all the items on The Compatibility Checklist G-3 check lists with him or her.

G-3 Compatibility Checklist:

Some of these questions I just couldn’t ask.

• The questions you’re most reluctant to ask will by where the biggest problems appear.
• These questions were prepared by thoughtful people who want the best for both of us.
• We won’t be held to the answers, but they can show our intent and ability to deal with difficult issues.
• The most essential part of our relationship will be our ability to communicate. If we aren’t good at it we best wait until we can.

G-4 Marriage:

He never listens.

• If I go out of my way to praise him and show interest in what he is doing, it will make my company and my input more important to him.
• By being less negative, critical, petty, thankless, and by praising him on occasions, he will be less inclined to avoid me or tune me out.

She nags me constantly.

• By helping her more and doing “my thing” a little less, we’d keep the closeness we had when we were first married.

G-5 Parenting:

My child tells me she doesn’t like me.

• On an interpersonal level I have to make the things that are more important to her more important to me
• She may act indifferent to me, but I have to act is if that isn’t annoy long enough for me to show her that she is and get our chemistry back.
• That could be her way of getting her way.

G-6 Guiding Your Kids:

My son challenges me all the time.

• Strong willed children are a lot more work, but in the adult word they tend to achieve greater heights than children who were compliant.
• The child who is very good at one part of their upbringing can be troublesome in other parts of their life.
• To keep from reward his challenges I have to side-step respond on my terms and have clear rules and consequences strictly enforced.

G-7 Empowering Your Kids:

I can’t get my kid interested in anything.

• I will:
  • Determine if there any difficulties with teachers or classmates.
  • Take more interest in all that she does and praise her honest efforts.
  • Be quick to support her interests.
  • Expose her to more interesting subjects.
  • Promote, but not pressure her efforts to interact with her wholesome peers.
  • Allow them more say on some choices.